The longer I am in a relationship the more I realize how overly dramatic I was while single. I was single for a while before and after my previous long term relationship. Single in that I wasn’t in a committed relationship. I dated, and I “saw” people for long periods of time, but went without calling someone my boyfriend for about three years. You can imagine how traumatic that first relationship was.
When that relationship was done I was left with a feeling that I wasn’t good enough. When the holidays came around I remembered that feeling, especially on Valentine’s Day. I felt that I had to do something or else I’d be at home questioning myself all evening. How ridiculous! Now that I’m in a healthy relationship, I remember what most holidays are about. When we’re kids we’re not thinking about the fact that no man/woman loves us romantically during Thanksgiving, Christmas, or New Years Eve. We’re excited to see our family, play with our cousins, our toys. On Valentine’s Day we pass cards to all of our friends. Why as adults do we put so much pressure on having love during the holidays?
As Valentine’s Day approached this year I couldn’t think of anything I necessarily cared to do. My boyfriend, in fear of disappointing me, threw a bunch of ideas at me. They were sweet and thoughtful, but I kept thinking about the crowds, the overpriced menus, the wait times, and I thought why? I have a great relationship I don’t need a dinner to tell me that. I’m fine with staying home, and getting a card. Then I think back to the Valentine’s Days I spent crying, or dreading, or caring way too much about. Funny how the holiday is no big deal now.
When you’re dating someone new or you’re single there’s a lot of pressure felt on Valentine’s Day. Just remember that even if a man or woman hasn’t said I love you yet, your family and friends have. You do have people who love you every day, celebrate that! One of the best Valentine’s Days (if not the best) I ever had was when I spent it in Las Vegas with two of my best friends. We bought sweets for ourselves, my brother bought me flowers, and we spent the night dancing away. Enjoy where you’re at in life right now, don’t worry about where you should be.
Happy Valentine’s Day!